Living & Longing//October 335th, 2024

Do I rush the seasons?

Probably.

Autumn has always been the only season for me. The other seasons have their moments, some more than others, but I never feel as alive as I do in September and October.

I don't necessarily mean to wish time away, but I can't help but yearn for what sets my heart ablaze, whether it's the dead of winter, the start of spring, or a day those unlike myself would deem 'perfect beach weather'.

Everyone has things they love, things they surround themselves with to make the most out of life. Mine just happens to be 'seasonal'.

Even as Halloween becomes more popular within mainstream society, so many people still don't understand the desire to hold onto that feeling all year round. Sometimes, even those within the Halloween community act like it takes away from things somehow, while I know I'd be miserable if I didn't live my life the way I do. I have tried to give it up, a few different times for a few different reasons, and I don't like, or even truly recognize the person I am without it.

I both live in Halloween, and long for it, eternally. And sometimes, when that first meteorological fall breath of September blows, I'm unsure how to feel.

'It's finally here!', the wind whispers to me. And then, in the same breath, 'It will be gone again soon.' Is there anything more fleeting than autumn? It truly feels like holding the hand of something that's dying. Watching the trees grow more bare every day, as the Christmas decor moves into stores, begging internally for just a little more time.

I am always counting down the days. It never feels close enough.

But then it comes. And sometimes, I can't help but think of how far away it will soon be again.

Is there anything more fleeting than autumn?

Comments

I Saw The Great Pumpkin Out For A Stroll//October 233rd, 2025

The most amazing thing happened to me, on a Saturday afternoon. The date was August 30th, just two days before Labor Day; the start of September, and, thankfully, the unofficial (but official, in my book) end of summer. I wound up at a local toy shop, coming away with some tiny plushies. (Two of them Christmas themed, ironically, as I am working toward finding the magic in all things once more .) As I exited the store, something caught my eye beyond the fence leading to the next residential street. A very tall pumpkin man seemed to be walking toward a house. My mind snapped back to when I was six years old, the very first time the Great Pumpkin came to visit me. How I'd heard him in the night, a candle rattling around in his head as he did his work, ensuring the happiest of Halloweens for the truest of believers. How special it felt to know I was one of his Chosen. I'd always hoped to thank him one day. I quietly tiptoed around the fence, out into the narr...

Pumpkin Guts: Devil’s Night//October 277th, 2024

I was recently given the opportunity to check out a new, independent Halloween short film called Pumpkin Guts: Devil’s Night. (Picture from IMDb) I first became aware of this film through the Instagram page , and to say I absolutely knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I’d love it, would be an understatement. I can always tell when a piece of media is truly going to radiate Halloween, in the way that will transport me through whatever month we’re currently in (in this case, probably the most disgusting July on record) and into Halloween night itself. When I was offered early access to this short film, I could not have been more honored. Even though I’ve built up somewhat of a following within the Halloween community, it still amazes me every day that people finally truly see and feel what I’m trying to create; that my love of Halloween finally means something and brings some joy and comfort to others like myself, and that anyone, especially a filmmaker, would trust me ...

My (Brutally?) Honest Thoughts On 'Weapons'//October 312th, 2025

I recently saw possibly the most hyped up horror of the 2025 season, Weapons. There have not been many movies I've been excited to see in 2025. The only horror movies I've seen in theaters this year have been Companion, Heart Eyes, and The Monkey. Other than that, nothing has really interested me enough to spend money on seeing it in theaters. (I do need to watch Sinners; scheduling conflicts kept arising when it came to seeing that one on the big screen.) But I absolutely loved the initial marketing for Weapons, making it look like footage from a real unsolved case, and it has easily been one of my most anticipated movies of the year. But, sadly, I actually didn't like it. This is not meant to be a "hot take" post in any way. I'm not here to rain on anyone's parade that did enjoy it, I just have a lot of thoughts about it that I want to unpack for myself, and maybe for anyone else who feels similarly. If you loved the movie, I'm honestly very ha...

Katie Pumpkinhead’s Pumpkin Patch

Search This Blog