Katie Pumpkinhead’s Pumpkin Patch

 Every year I talk about November 1st...it's such a confusing day. It makes me feel so many emotions all at once. Mournful, depressed, angry...It's like a slap in the face shoving us into a new month, forcing us to forget what came just hours before. Last year, I did have somewhat of  an epiphany  regarding the month of November as a whole, and while I do my best to keep my own past words in mind, that doesn't make today any easier. Or easy to explain, for that matter. I suppose I should speak from my heart.  Today I feel detached from reality, as if I don't really exist. Like there is no longer a place in the world for me. Just yesterday everything I loved made sense, and was loved and revered by everyone else as well. I felt like I fit. But now, today, I see those same things being quickly shoved away. Less than twenty-four hours after trick-or-treating time began, it's all being swept under the rug. The season culminated and the world is no longer a place I recog...

 If you’ve followed me on social media long enough, you’ll probably recall me mentioning a song I made up as a child, titled “The Halloween Flame Is Still Burning.”  This post  is probably where I’ve talked about in the most detail.  I was around eight or nine years old, thinking about Halloween as usual, even though it was spring time, and of course, what is the thought of Halloween for someone like me, without the accompanying thought of post-Halloween depression?  “The Halloween Flame Is Still Burning” was about the combination of sadness that Halloween was over, at least to those around me, but also the burst of hope and intrigue that came from seeing Halloween decorations still out in the wild, even after the day itself had passed. Sadly, I don’t think I ever actually wrote the song down. I’ve spent probably sad amounts of time trying to remember it, usually during the month of November, but only a few lines have ever found their way back to me. The song wa...

 It's a strange and fascinating, thought not necessarily in a good way, feeling, when you feel so at home in the world one day and then like you've landed on an alien planet the next. How can something that felt so perfect, so comfortable yesterday, feel so foreign and off-putting today? This is how November first has always felt for me, though. I've often compared it to being away at boarding school for about ninety percent of the year. You spend this huge chunk of time in a place where you don't fit in, that never truly feels like home even if you have a bed there, and then suddenly, for one glorious month or so, you're able to travel back to your real home. It feels so fabulous, so welcoming. You finally feel like you're a part of the world again. You have a family, a home, a place.  But, of course that wretched thing called the calendar has to involve itself and the day comes where it dictates you must get back on that bus and get back to that false excuse f...