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American Horror Story: Double Feature: Red Tide Episode 3: Thirst//October 338th, 2021

 Time for another AHS review and recap! (I promise I’ll write about something else again one of these days, it’s just hard to find the time and energy for original writing at this point in time and the reviews are honestly saving my soul.) 

I’m going to be just like the episode and get right into it. And by “it”, I mean referencing Lyme disease. We pick up basically right where we left off last week, with Doris rushing Alma into the house after finding her feasting on rabbit blood in the cemetery, and Doris is immediately blaming it on Lyme disease. That’s right, boils and ghouls, we don’t even get a full minute into the episode without Doris Gardner blaming Lyme disease for every problem in Provincetown, and possibly the world. Luckily, Chief Burleson shows up and wants to take Alma downtown to ask a few questions, and Doris promptly has a fainting spell. Harry gets the Chief to leave them alone, claiming the stress is getting to Doris and completely ignoring the fact that Doris is basically the definition of stress. But, thankfully, Doris ends up in a hospital in a town that sounds like it’s called High Anus, on bed rest for the remainder of the episode, so, we amazingly only hear the words “Lyme disease” uttered a total of two times. 

While at the hospital, Harry promises Doris that they will leave P-Town, even going as far as to say he’ll take Alma back to New York that very night. We see them driving, however, Alma recognizes that they’re going in the wrong direction. Harry admits to lying to Doris and the two have an eerily, almost disturbingly calm conversation about the pills and drinking blood. Alma once again roasts her mother and I am, once again, here for it. She asks why they even need her and I can’t help but wonder the same thing. Her bland ass brings nothing to the creative vibe of the family, and she’s maybe a step and a half away from Ally Mayfair-Richards levels of “too terrified to function”. But, regardless of how I feel about Doris as a character, it’s still a strange and disturbing thing to hear a child say, and so effortlessly so, about her mother, when there are no signs that she’s actually bad to Alma other than being a helicopter mom who likes to diagnose her with Lyme disease. Equally disturbing is how easily Alma says she doesn’t care what happens to her body while on these pills. She has no interest in children or marriage, the only thing she cares about in any capacity is her music. We all have our passions, but the lack of empathy Alma is showing here is truly creepy to see in a nine-year-old girl. I know a lot of people really don’t seem to like her, but I daresay Alma is one of the best horror kids ever.

Anyway, Harry and Alma come to the agreement that Alma must never hunt for her own blood. Harry will bring it to her when he goes on his own missions, and that’s that. It turns out, much like her mother, Alma also has a two-word catchphrase: “I’m hungry.” And so Harry sets out on a mission to find her some blood.

He ends up going to a house that appears to be inhabited by a junkie girl, but it turns out she’s living there with a redneck guy, played by Blake Shields, who we’ve recently seen in the “Feral” episode American Horror Stories. I truly enjoy this man as an actor and I would love to see more of him in the show, but this particular side story seems bloated and unnecessary. It turns out Harry has stumbled into the home of two wackos who make pornographic snuff films. It’s a weird, WTF? moment that’s unsettling but adds nothing to the story, much like the gimp scene in Cult or basically the Addiction Demon in Hotel’s entire existence. (Though I think the latter was intended to be a much bigger subplot that just didn’t end up going anywhere.) Regardless, Harry obviously breaks free and feeds on the girl, while bringing the guy’s blood back to Alma. PS, this couple is dumb, because who the hell shows their faces while filming something like that?

On his next run with Belle and Austin, they take notice of him putting some blood in a thermos, and they, particularly Belle, are not happy about it. They want her off the pill, but have already decided they need to die anyway, and Belle seems quite excited at the prospect of young blood.

Meanwhile, Harry’s publicist Ursula has come to town and she is beyond suspicious upon realizing that every creative soul who visits the place suddenly turns into a legend at what they do, particularly after reading a script penned by Mickey. She finally gets Mickey to admit to existence of the pills, and even go so far as to help her find The Chemist, so she can try to cut a deal selling the pills to her clients. Belle is less than thrilled about all of this, and demands that Mickey kill Ursula, and also do some other dirty work for her in exchange for providing the pills, which he technically stole the first time but do we think Belle cares? She runs this town. Mickey goes to Ursula with the intent to kill her, but when she tells him she can make his dream Speed Racer remake happen, he immediately reconsiders and actually takes Ursula to The Chemist, who, as far as we are shown, refuses Ursula’s offer. The Chemist then goes to Belle and Austin, threatening to cut them off if they don’t make all of this insanity stop. Basically, The Chemist wants everyone dead. Meanwhile Mickey kills a guy and Denis O’Hare, as a man called Holden, is the only witness. Random, but happy to see my other favorite member of the AHS cast. I’m guessing his role will be slightly bigger than this, and I hope to God he has a scene with Belle because the last time my two faves had a scene together, one was bashing the other’s skull in and I. AM. STILL. TRAUMATIZED. but it was so nice to see him regardless.



That night, Harry decides to go on a hunting trip and leave Alma with Ursula. Alma warns him to be quick because she’s hungry for probably the fortieth time this episode. Perhaps she is the Lyme disease her mother so desperately worries about. Anyway, Ursula is clearly not babysitter material and retires upstairs for a nap. It looks like Alma might have it on her mind to kill her, but then Chief Burleson returns, looking to finish the conversation she was trying to start before Doris finally shut up about Lyme disease passed out from the stress of it all. When the Chief says that she is going to arrest Harry, Alma’s switch flips and she kills her. Effortlessly and without remorse. This kid was made to be a serial killer, honestly. Harry arrives home to find Chief Burleson dead on his coffee table (Doris will be appalled; blood isn’t beige!) and Alma playing cards with Ursula. Ursula is completely unfazed, actually pretty amused, as she tells Harry they need to talk, and the episode ends.

This episode had a lot going on, and I wasn’t expecting a big death so quickly, but then, I keep forgetting that this portion of the season is already half over. I’m not entirely sure how I feel about that, as I’m not a big alien fan, but I am going to miss this story and setting regardless.

But...I have a big theory now after seeing this episode, and especially the untimely death of the police chief that’s already been labeled a “nosy bitch” by the locals previously.

I think Belle is actually going to end up loving Alma when she meets her. Her focus, her drive, and in particular, her complete lack of empathy and remorse is going to really speak to Belle for several reasons. And Belle is exactly Alma’s type of person as well. She doesn’t let interpersonal relationships affect how she feels about anything and ultimately, her own personal success is the only thing she really cares about. They both strive to be the absolute best at what they do, everything and everyone else be damned. And it’s already been established that Alma isn’t thrilled about Doris’ pregnancy. There’s a very good chance she feels threatened by the unborn baby. So, I am seeing a scenario in which Harry and Doris may both die, and Alma will stay with Belle, possibly even going so far as to bring Belle her newborn sibling as an offering. I mean, that weird scene with Karen bringing Belle a baby has to mean something, right? And think about it, with a child on her side, how much easier will it be for Belle to get young blood? (Any other fans of the Hannibal TV series in the house? Think Garrett Jacob Hobbs and Abigail.) I question if AHS would deliver us an ending that dark, as many seasons usually end on some sort of triumphant note in a twisted way, but then I remember the dismal ending of Feral, the superior episode of Stories, and think I just may be right about this. An Alma and Belle team-up makes perfect sense. Either that or Alma will be the one to kill Belle in the end, but I really don’t see that happening. Villain or not, Belle is on par with what Alma deems important. Belle is, most likely, a version of what Alma hopes to become. In her mind, Belle would be a much more fitting mother than Doris.

I also have a weird feeling that The Chemist actually did take the deal with Ursula and is hiding it from Belle and Austin for some reason, but I could be dead wrong about that. It’s just a weird hunch.

Whatever happens, I am still excited to see where this story goes, and I really do wish it were longer. While there were some parts of this episode that felt like a bit much, I still do think this is the best the show has been in years.

Stay spooky, my friends. I’m hungry...

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